dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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