She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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