garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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