Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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