Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
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