My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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