Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
