I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize