This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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