No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Randomize