I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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