He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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