Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
My feet surprised me
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