at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
