omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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