i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
