It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize