my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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