Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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