I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
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