I want to have your abortion
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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