at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Randomize
