I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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