There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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