oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
