At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
