Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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