its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
