# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
