I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
