Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
pray to the hookup gods
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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