U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
