I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
