i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
No more Irish car bombs ever.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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