just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize