I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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