At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
A bitchslap is in order.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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