Define "chronic" masturbator.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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