my text book just quoted the cookie monster
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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