Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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