He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
