she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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