I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
COCAINE IS GR8
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