i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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