Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
