doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize
