Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
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