Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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