Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize