Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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